Topics You and Your Future Spouse Need To Discuss Before Tying the Knot

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Topics You and Your Future Spouse Need To Discuss Before Tying the Knot

There are quite a few topics you would want to discuss before getting married. Couples all over the world pledge to marry each other with the understanding that their lives will be tied together. Canadian couples understand the concept of “two becoming one.” They know that married life will be one of joint decision-making, compromises, and hopefully, a balanced exchange of ideas. A successful union is more than just sharing a home or a bed. You’ll be sharing more than just a living space, which is why it’s important to see where the two of you stand on certain key issues. It’s hard to know your significant other’s perspective without having these difficult, although critical, conversations before the big day.

Money, Money, Money

Can you imagine marrying a person with no knowledge of their income or assets? Presumably you’ll be living together, so you’ll need to have a conversation about how monthly expenses will be paid. Expand the conversation to other key money-related topics:

  • Attitudes towards money
  • Sharing bank accounts or maintaining existing assets
  • Short-term financial goals, such as saving for the wedding or a down payment for a home
  • Long-term financial goals, including college planning, retirement, and estate planning
  • Credit histories and attitudes on debt
  • Appetite for risk when it comes to investing

Sex and Intimacy

There are many opinions about whether couples should or shouldn’t have sex before marriage. Even if both of you are on the same page, it’s important to talk openly and honestly about sex and intimacy. Are there practices you enjoy? What about your partner? What if you have an aversion to the acts and expressions your partner finds enjoyable? You don’t want to discover on your honeymoon that you and your partner are incompatible when it comes to sex, intimacy, and affection.

Topics With Health Issues

Many engaged and newly married couples intend to start families of their own. Every couple should talk honestly and freely about health issues, especially those that run in their families. Are you predisposed to certain medical conditions? For example, if you and your spouse both come from families with a history of certain chronic diseases, you’ll want to know that, especially if you plan to have children together. Even if kids aren’t a part of the long-term plan, you should discuss medical histories. If dramatic lifestyle changes become necessary for one of you, both of you will be impacted. 

Topics On Worldviews

If you’ve been dating for a while, there’s a good chance you know your significant other’s perspective when it comes to religion and politics. You might think you’re on board with your partner’s worldview, but you’d hate to be blindsided after marriage. Some people avoid discussing these topics, thinking they’re unfruitful or destructive. It’s critical to know where you both stand. Issues you find trivial may be a big deal to your future spouse. You may be ok with your partner having a different religion or political view, but that may change once children enter the picture.

Conflict Resolution Topics

It’s safe to say you and your significant other won’t agree on everything. That’s ok. Successful marriages aren’t about avoiding conflict but rather resolving it in a way that is mutually beneficial and healthy. Do you prefer to deal with conflict as it comes up? Maybe one or both of you tend to struggle with small disagreements, which can become bigger sources of contention. Not only do you need to discuss conflict resolution, but it’s also important to recognize how your biases, insecurities, and vulnerabilities may show up in your disagreements.

Sharing life together as a married couple means understanding that some days won’t be as sunny as others. Having open and honest discussions about difficult topics beforehand can help you navigate through and around storms. While it’s important to approach marriage with an open heart, open eyes are also critical.  

Topics You and Your Future Spouse Need To Discuss Before Tying the Knot

There are quite a few topics you would want to discuss before getting married. Couples all over the world pledge to marry each other with the understanding that their lives will be tied together. Canadian couples understand the concept of “two becoming one.” They know that married life will be one of joint decision-making, compromises, and hopefully, a balanced exchange of ideas. A successful union is more than just sharing a home or a bed. You’ll be sharing more than just a living space, which is why it’s important to see where the two of you stand on certain key issues. It’s hard to know your significant other’s perspective without having these difficult, although critical, conversations before the big day.

Money, Money, Money

Can you imagine marrying a person with no knowledge of their income or assets? Presumably you’ll be living together, so you’ll need to have a conversation about how monthly expenses will be paid. Expand the conversation to other key money-related topics:

  • Attitudes towards money
  • Sharing bank accounts or maintaining existing assets
  • Short-term financial goals, such as saving for the wedding or a down payment for a home
  • Long-term financial goals, including college planning, retirement, and estate planning
  • Credit histories and attitudes on debt
  • Appetite for risk when it comes to investing

Sex and Intimacy

There are many opinions about whether couples should or shouldn’t have sex before marriage. Even if both of you are on the same page, it’s important to talk openly and honestly about sex and intimacy. Are there practices you enjoy? What about your partner? What if you have an aversion to the acts and expressions your partner finds enjoyable? You don’t want to discover on your honeymoon that you and your partner are incompatible when it comes to sex, intimacy, and affection.

Topics With Health Issues

Many engaged and newly married couples intend to start families of their own. Every couple should talk honestly and freely about health issues, especially those that run in their families. Are you predisposed to certain medical conditions? For example, if you and your spouse both come from families with a history of certain chronic diseases, you’ll want to know that, especially if you plan to have children together. Even if kids aren’t a part of the long-term plan, you should discuss medical histories. If dramatic lifestyle changes become necessary for one of you, both of you will be impacted. 

Topics On Worldviews

If you’ve been dating for a while, there’s a good chance you know your significant other’s perspective when it comes to religion and politics. You might think you’re on board with your partner’s worldview, but you’d hate to be blindsided after marriage. Some people avoid discussing these topics, thinking they’re unfruitful or destructive. It’s critical to know where you both stand. Issues you find trivial may be a big deal to your future spouse. You may be ok with your partner having a different religion or political view, but that may change once children enter the picture.

Conflict Resolution Topics

It’s safe to say you and your significant other won’t agree on everything. That’s ok. Successful marriages aren’t about avoiding conflict but rather resolving it in a way that is mutually beneficial and healthy. Do you prefer to deal with conflict as it comes up? Maybe one or both of you tend to struggle with small disagreements, which can become bigger sources of contention. Not only do you need to discuss conflict resolution, but it’s also important to recognize how your biases, insecurities, and vulnerabilities may show up in your disagreements.

Sharing life together as a married couple means understanding that some days won’t be as sunny as others. Having open and honest discussions about difficult topics beforehand can help you navigate through and around storms. While it’s important to approach marriage with an open heart, open eyes are also critical.  

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