Wedding crashers regard their practice as an art form, but how do you deal with those uninvited guests at your own nuptials?
Every weekend across Canada, newlywed couples unknowingly host a few extras who weren’t on their guest lists. The 2005 film Wedding Crashers depicts a pair of freeloading cads with dastardly ideas in mind, but real wedding crashers regard the practice as an art form requiring subtlety and skill. How do you deal with those uninvited guests? A few smart tips can help you handle crashers if they show up to your celebration.
Wedding Crashing 101: Tips From the Experts
In truth, most experienced wedding crashers don’t act much like the protagonists of the 2005 film. Blending in is a key part of most revelers’ strategy, as a July 2018 Elite Daily piece revealed. Successful crashers favor large weddings, especially those hosted at large hotels or ballrooms, and some even attend the ceremony beforehand to get details about the couple. Dressing the part is also essential, and a few even bring cards addressed “To the Newlyweds” to make their presence seem more legitimate.
Meanwhile, Urban Daddy’s Sam Eichner interviewed expert-level party crasher Fred Karger, whose exploits include sneaking into the 1972 Oscars ceremony and the 2017 Met Gala. Karger practices some of the same strategies divulged by the crashers in the Elite Daily article but added three more tips of his own:
- Create a convincing yet somewhat vague backstory.
- Follow the crowd, especially when entering an event.
- Keep your eye on security and staff members.
How To Spot Crashers at Your Event
Now that you have some sense of how experienced party crashers work their way into an event, you also know a little bit about how to spot one. Crashers typically spend most of their time near the bar or on the dance floor, but The Knot offers some additional details that give these individuals away:
- Not sitting down during the reception
- Avoiding your wedding planner, security, or venue staff
- Entering during the receiving line or after the speeches
- Vague backstories that keep changing
- Claiming to be an old college friend or distant relation
The Knot adds that some crashers may dance with elderly guests or exhibit bold, outrageous personalities. However, Fred Karger points out that these moves aren’t typical among savvy crashers and reveals that you may have an amateur freeloader on your hands.
Should They Stay or Should They Go?
Wedding Bee’s Cheyenne Bolt points out that there’s no uniform approach to dealing with uninvited attendees at your wedding. When deciding how to handle them, Bolt advises evaluating the impact that the crashers have on your gathering. If there’s room and they aren’t being disruptive or disrespectful, you could allow them to remain and enjoy the celebration.
Nevertheless, if you’re pressed for room, the venue won’t allow it, or your other guests are negatively impacted, you’ll have to ask them to leave. Bolt recommends that someone else — perhaps a family member, your wedding planner, or the venue’s staff — should deliver the bad news and escort them out. Brides writer Jen Glantz also suggests finding out your venue’s point of contact for security issues before your event. If you’re super worried about crashers, you may want to consider having a scaled-down private event, arranging for a small security detail, and avoiding hosting it at a ballroom, hotel, or other major public location.
Choose a Smart Approach for Handling Crashers
Whether you’re concerned about freeloaders at your reception or you view wedding crashers as par for the course, it doesn’t hurt to have a plan of action in mind. The decision of whether to let them stay or give them the boot is up to you, but it’s another less pleasant aspect you’ll need to consider as you plan your special day.
