Recovery

Wedding Day Sobriety: A Guide for Guests
If you’re a wedding guest attempting sobriety, it’s natural to feel a little anxiety. Some smart advice can help you remain a faithful teetotaler.

If you’re a wedding guest attempting sobriety, it’s natural to feel a little anxiety. Some smart advice can help you remain a faithful teetotaler.

Wedding receptions often offer the perfect trifecta of food, fun, and drinks. Yet, this can present significant challenges for guests recovering from alcohol dependency. Fortunately, sitting out these celebrations isn’t the only option. Since sobriety is an important goal, how can this be achieved when the booze is flowing and emotions are high? Some smart advice can help you remain a dedicated teetotaler.

Guests in Recovery: You’re Not Alone

If you’re a wedding guest aiming for sobriety, it’s natural to feel a little anxiety. After all, you’re in a social situation where alcohol is plentiful and you’re surrounded by others who drink. Ravishly contributor Britni de la Cretaz describes feelings of loneliness when attending receptions. Medium writer Tiffany Swedeen mentions her own temptations to imbibe. SobrieTea Party’s Tawny Lara admits her own struggles. Before she tried recovery, she usually found herself drinking too much at others’ nuptials.

Powerful physical and psychological cravings are frequently triggered by emotional stress, fatigue, nostalgia, or feeling left out. Unsurprisingly, all these emotions and conditions can resurface at weddings. You may encounter some saboteurs, as blogger Dana Bowman points out. However, most of your fellow attendees don’t wish to interfere with your recovery.

Stay Alcohol-Free With These Tips

Swedeen, de la Cretaz, and Lara draw on their own experiences, offering advice to wedding guests planning on sobriety. One valuable tip is to stop worrying about how others view you. Most people will not notice or concern themselves with what you’re actually drinking, so having a non-alcoholic beverage in hand can be a lifesaver. This can be anything that makes you feel comfortable: lime and seltzer water, a soft drink, a cup of coffee, or anything else you like.

Enlisting a trustworthy individual or two could help you avoid indulgence.  Be sure to give bartenders a heads up, letting them know not to serve you intoxicating drinks. You may wish to bring along a sober friend, seek out another teetotaler at the festivities, or have someone you can call or text if you need support or feel unsafe.

Distracting yourself is also a great approach when you’re at a reception. Take advantage of food, dancing, music, camaraderie, and activities. Are you a champ at horseshoes, darts, or croquet? Use the lawn games to show off your prowess. Hit the dance floor. Eat an extra cupcake. Talk someone else’s ear off. You get the idea.

Refrain From Judging Other Guests

One common pitfall that Lara mentions is the habit of silently judging others. As an individual in recovery, you could find yourself eying other guests’ behaviors. Looking down on them for their drinking and intoxication won’t contribute to your own efforts. Lara reminds readers that everyone’s relationship with alcohol is a little different. Respect is key, so remember that others’ drinking habits have nothing to do with your own sobriety.

Know When To Walk Away

While you’re planning ahead for your friends’ reception, don’t forget to construct an exit strategy. Feel free to leave early if you must, especially if you feel too tempted to drink. If you’re bringing a sober companion, let that person know that you may want to depart before the reception ends. Those attending alone should make sure they have phone numbers of reliable friends or a transport company just in case.

Don’t Worry: You’ve Got This

Recovering from alcohol dependency isn’t an easy process, but social situations can make it rougher than usual. While you want to enjoy yourself at your friends’ wedding reception, it can also be an opportunity to re-acclimate to scenarios in which alcohol is served. Staying sober requires some advance planning. Keeping a nonalcoholic drink in hand is a useful strategy, along with relying on supportive friends and having an exit plan ready.

Celebrate Recovery on September 30
It feels great to celebrate recovery when you finally reach the finish line.

In order to celebrate recovery, we need to understand that it is not an easy road.

One of the most debilitating diseases in the world is addiction. It’s estimated that about 4.5 million Canadians suffer from drug addiction, and this figure doesn’t include family members affected by addiction. Fortunately, there is treatment available, but addiction is not curable. Those who have conquered their addiction are considered recovered, not cured. It’s important to realize that many people go on to live productive and healthy lives once they stop using the addictive substance. Since 2012, there’s been a push to celebrate recovery from addictions.

In the United States, September is designated Recovery Month, but here in Canada, we just have Recovery Day. Last year, about 30 cities held special events, and this year, even more will. Recovery Day began with a nine-minute video by filmmaker Greg Williams that had the goal of breaking down the stigma of addiction and focusing on solutions to addiction. The movement began in Vancouver but has trickled across the country to help others.

Myths About Addiction and Treatment

Many times, addicts are seen as bad people making bad decisions, but drug and alcohol addiction is much more complex than we realize. There’s no “one size fits all” to cure addiction. Often, addictions come hand-in-hand with other mental health problems, such as anxiety or depression, and all of the health problems within a person have to be dealt with to find long-term recovery. Here are a few other myths associated with treatment and addiction:

  1. Addiction is a character flaw.

Addiction is actually a brain disease.

  1. People can just stop using drugs if they want to.

Drug and alcohol addiction actually changes the brain, which leads to a compulsion to use the substance. Teens become addicted much more quickly than adults because their brains are not fully developed.

  1. You can’t force a person into treatment for it to be successful.

Many people go into treatment to keep a job or because the legal system ordered them into it.

  1. Treatment should be a one-shot deal.

Studies show that treatment reduces many of the risky behaviors associated with addiction and it reduces the substance use, but many addicts need continuous treatment to overcome drug and alcohol use. There are some who can quit cold turkey and never go back to using the substance again, but many others need a wide array of services to keep them on the road to recovery. Treatment needs to be individually tailored to address each person’s specific needs.

  1. After treatment, if a person continues to abuse drugs or alcohol, it’s a hopeless situation.

Relapse into substance abuse is not failure. Addiction is a chronic disorder that makes a person more vulnerable when dealing with work and family problems. Stress can trigger a relapse, especially in the first few months following a release from a treatment program. Don’t give up on an addict, because recovery is a long process that isn’t easy.

A Day to Celebrate Recovery Gives Hope

When people come together to share their recovery stories, it’s proof that treatment does work. Recovery is possible. The awareness Recovery Day brings challenges the societal stigma of addiction, and it builds community to give hope to others who are dealing with this difficult problem.

Recoverydaycanada.com has information about events in different cities. Vancouver is hosting a street festival. Montreal hosted an event at Girouard Park on September 17.

If you miss out on the event in your community, make plans to celebrate with your friends who are in recovery to honor their commitment to their health. Find inspiration and support in what they’re doing to maintain sobriety. Give hope to others who may have friends and family dealing with addiction. Let’s focus on solutions and finding help instead of shaming addicts.

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