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Getting Guests To Unplug at Your Wedding

Many people have a problem giving up their devices, even for a solemn occasion like a wedding. An unplugged wedding is one in which the guests are asked not to have their phones out at all. It’s not about putting phones on silent or turning off the flash on their cameras. Guests are requested to put their phones away completely.

Even though device-free weddings are on trend, asking your friends and family to go without their phones for just a few hours can be controversial. Here are some things to consider if you’d like to have an unplugged wedding.

Decide How Much of Your Wedding You Want Technology-Free

Before you tell guests that you want a device-free wedding, make sure you and your partner are on the same page. Do you want both the ceremony and reception free of phones? Many couples ask that the ceremony be device free while allowing phones at the reception, provided that guests respect the professional photographer when getting those special moments, like cutting the cake or the first dance.

Present the Positives of Unplugging

Smartphones today are almost necessary, so getting guests to buy into your unplugged wedding will take some delicate footwork. Starting with your invitations, tell your guests that you’d like them to enjoy the ceremony without distractions from their phones. You want your guests to be present and in the moment.

You’ll need to repeat this multiple times through your wedding communications, from the save the date, on your website and at the venue itself. Have the officiant mention it during the welcome speech, too. This figure of authority can be more impactful than signs.

How Do You Enforce an Unplugged Wedding?

You’re going to have to deal with guests who think they’re exempt from the no-device rule. Plan on taking a gracious approach, not a confrontational one. Give guests a station where phones can be safely stored during the ceremony. Don’t make this mandatory, but give options. Have one or two ushers who are comfortable asking guests to put their phones away if a guest sneaks them out to take a selfie.

Don’t threaten to take phones away. You hope your guests will want to support an unplugged wedding because it can be a refreshing moment where they can slow down. Going into punishment mode will put people on the defensive, which will take away the moment.

Are There Disadvantages to an Unplugged Wedding?

Before you completely unplug, consider another side. Guests like to take photos of events to remember for themselves. You may get copies of all your photos from the photographer, but most guests won’t have that option. In addition, you won’t get to see your wedding through the guest’s eyes.

Your guests may want pictures of family and friends they only get to see occasionally, and your photographer won’t be able to be everywhere. During the reception, guests can help take pictures of the fun stuff you might otherwise miss. While it’s nice to unplug for a while, getting those candid shots the photographer might miss is a good reason for guests to have their devices during the reception.

Be Gracious and Find Balance

There’s nothing wrong with wanting an unplugged wedding ceremony. Putting phones down can help your guests connect with you and your other guests. Expect pushback but stay confident in your decision; have polite answers that affirm your choice of an unplugged wedding. Give guests the opportunity to take photos with the bridal party and their friends and family.

Your wedding can be more intimate when your guests unplug during the ceremony. Ask your guests to “hold the phone” to be present for your wedding.

Keeping the Right Mindset as You Plan Your Wedding

Wedding blues got you down and in a negative mindset? You’re not alone. Research collected over the years suggests that planning a big event like a wedding can take a toll on a person’s mental state. From stress to anxiety to the desire to make it all go a specific way, you may find yourself overwhelmed by negative feelings during a time that is supposed to be happy. While it might be difficult to deal with, there’s a lot to be said for adopting the right mindset. Use these tips to stay positive and see what a difference it can make.

Be Realistic

Perhaps the best bit of advice you’ll receive while planning a wedding is to keep your goals realistic. While it might be exciting to try and plan an event that is as lavish as your dreams allow, you definitely will benefit from being practical about your expectations. For example, you can only control so much. If you want the day to go according to some script in your mind, then you are setting yourself up for disappointment. You need to accept that your wedding is only in your hands up until a certain point.

Slough It Off

An unforeseen problem like the news of bad weather on the day of your wedding or poor attitudes from some of your guests might cause internal conflict. However, you are never going to benefit from internalizing the frustrations put on you by others. Instead, learn to shake off whatever it is that is causing you momentary distress. Sure, it might be annoying to deal with rain on your big day, but are you going to let a little bit of water spoil all that you’ve put into the plan?

Some things will be easier to slough off than others. When you’re dealing with a problematic family member who wants to add his or her two cents to every decision you make, you may not be able to shrug it off with the same ease. For scenarios like this, try and work out a solution that will keep the effort you put in to a minimum while still helping you feel better about the situation.

Try To Smile

Did you know that smiling can actually help you feel better when you’re in a negative mood? When you smile, it activates the part of your brain that produces the hormones related to happy feelings. Though you may not be feeling your best, try smiling for a little while. As time passes, you will start to notice that your own mood has been improved somewhat. Your emotions are in your control to a degree, though it might not always feel that way.

The smaller irritations in life have a way of seeming less significant when you maintain the right attitude. While this action should never be a substitute for actually dealing with significant problems or bad thoughts, smiling through the small stuff that appears can do wonders for how you feel overall.

Confront Bad Thoughts and Keep a Good Mindset

Plenty of people give in when confronted with negative thoughts. Instead of challenging an idea, they will allow it to overcome them and dictate their decisions. If you’re stressed from planning a wedding, you may find yourself snapping at friends or acting out of character. This is likely due to the fact that you are not addressing your real thoughts or feelings about a specific situation. When confronted with negative thoughts, be sure not to push them away.

Keeping the right mindset can do wonders for your ability to feel your best when planning your wedding. Develop a strategy that you can repeat whenever you feel stressed and see how it changes your attitude overall.