Building Intimacy in Your Marriage Through Curiosity
It is no surprise to learn that relationships change over time. The longer you are with someone, the easier it can be to predict this individual’s actions and words. While there is a lot of comfort to be found in knowing someone intimately, it can also take some of the excitement out of the relationship. This is because curiosity is one of the most important components of the human spirit. When you are curious about something, whether it be a topic of research or another person, you are more likely to feel engaged and the intimacy alive.
Though curiosity might fade as a marriage progresses, there are ways to keep your intrigue alive. Review these ideas and discover how a few simple steps can help you remain curious about your partner and keep intimacy alive.
Start With Active Listening
How often have you found yourself zoning out while your significant other is speaking to you? When you have had a long day and you enter into a conversation with your partner, you might find yourself struggling to stay engaged. This is because many people are not adept at active listening. Since they have heard their partners tell the same stories a dozen times, they start to listen with less interest and assume they know how the stories will play out. However, actively listening to your partner is absolutely key to remaining curious.
No matter how long you’ve been married, you really don’t know what words will come out of your partner’s mouth. By keeping yourself focused and listening with intent, you are showing your significant other that you care. Active listening will help you hold onto details being brought up in a story. This, in turn, will cause you to ask additional questions about the story. The more you interact with your significant other while he or she is talking to you, the easier it is for a natural ebb and flow of conversation to occur, this can help with keeping intimacy spark thriving.
Intimacy and Learning To Meet Your Partners Needs
Just as a relationship changes over time, so do the needs of both partners. Unfortunately, many couples fail to check in about these topics. If you are operating under the assumption that your spouse has the exact same needs he or she had when you met many years ago, you definitely need to make some changes. Being curious about your significant other is all about asking questions. If your partner is acting off, you should be direct and learn more about why. Acting under an assumption based on outdated needs can be a huge mistake.
When you show your partner that you care about his or her needs, you are nourishing your relationship in a significant way. Since you don’t want to assume and needs are always changing, the best way to gain perspective is to be curious and direct. When your partner seems down, ask why instead of assuming you already know.
Future Talks
Planning for the future is par for the course in most relationships. Still, you might find you really don’t know much about what your partner’s hopes and dreams are anymore. Early in a relationship, it is easy to openly discuss long-term goals and desires. As time moves on, however, such objectives can become more personal and unspoken. By having regular conversations about the future, you can show a vested interest in what your significant other wants to achieve down the line. This can help you plan together and, more importantly, stay open with each other.
While relationships might change and shift over the years, there is no need to throw in the towel. In many cases, a little bit of curiosity can go a long way to keep a relationship fresh. Learn to engage and remain interested in your partner’s thoughts and ideas, and see how a little intrigue can keep your bond strong.