Tips for Writing Thank-You Notes for the Newly Married Couple

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Tips for Writing Thank-You Notes for the Newly Married Couple

Vintage floral vector card with colorful summer garden flowers.

It seems as if sending letters through the mail is passé. While most of the time it’s okay to send your friends an email or text instead of a snail-mail message, there are at least two times when electronic messages are discouraged. When you have a friend that passes away, you should take the time to write a note or card and mail it. This lets the family open it when they’re ready. It’s just good etiquette.

Thank-you notes for wedding gifts are another time when you (and your spouse) should send a handwritten note. Your guests took time to give you a special gift. It’s customary to send the thank-you in the mail. The task can be overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be. Let’s look at some ways you can make it easier to get these notes out in the mail. You cannot post a generic thank-you on your website or send a form email to your guests.

As the Gifts Come In

  • Be responsible and track what gifts you’ve received and from whom. This will make your life much easier later.
  • Put someone in charge of tracking gifts at each shower and taping cards to gifts for later.
  • Have someone you trust take care of wedding gifts received at the reception. Give that person a roll of tape to attach cards to gifts before transport.
  • Spend one evening writing thank-you notes for bridal shower gifts. Ask your spouse to help. This eliminates having to write so many after the wedding.
  • Acknowledge shipped gifts when you receive them, which is another way to save time after the wedding. This also lets the recipient know the gift has been received.
  • Order custom thank-you cards before the wedding when you’re ordering invitations to have them ready to go. Have stamps on hand, too. This lets you choose the stamps you want to use.
  • Print out return address labels or order them. Have two sets: one for before the wedding and one with your married name.
  • Separate notes are required for each gift at each party. You should not write one note to one person who attended the engagement party, bridal shower and wedding and gave you three gifts.

After the Wedding When You’re Writing Notes

  • Personalize each card. Reference the individual who gave you the gift and the gift itself.
  • Don’t feel as if you have to gush. Just be enthusiastic.
  • Don’t mention that you might return the gift.
  • For monetary gifts, mention how you used the funds. It’s okay not to mention the amount, but you can if you choose.
  • If you want to use wedding photos in the cards, make sure you can get them back promptly. Don’t delay sending notes because you’re waiting on photos.
  • Don’t use form letters or a pre-printed card.
  • Both of you should be involved in sending notes, no matter which side of the family gave the gift. This may be the first time you and your new spouse have to work together after the ceremony.
  • Do the thank-you notes in batches, say 20 every evening. It won’t take long to knock them all out and you won’t get so burned out as you do them.
  • If you aren’t familiar with the gift-giver, use formal greetings. It’s okay to address someone as “Mrs. Smith” if that’s how you know her.
  • It’s also very nice to address their presence at the wedding. You might even wish to send notes to everyone who attended.

No, you don’t have a year to write thank-you notes. At one time, that might have been the rule, but it’s not today. Get those notes out ASAP, within a month of your wedding. Your job isn’t done until the thank-yous have been sent.

Tips for Writing Thank-You Notes for the Newly Married Couple
Vintage floral vector card with colorful summer garden flowers.

It seems as if sending letters through the mail is passé. While most of the time it’s okay to send your friends an email or text instead of a snail-mail message, there are at least two times when electronic messages are discouraged. When you have a friend that passes away, you should take the time to write a note or card and mail it. This lets the family open it when they’re ready. It’s just good etiquette.

Thank-you notes for wedding gifts are another time when you (and your spouse) should send a handwritten note. Your guests took time to give you a special gift. It’s customary to send the thank-you in the mail. The task can be overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be. Let’s look at some ways you can make it easier to get these notes out in the mail. You cannot post a generic thank-you on your website or send a form email to your guests.

As the Gifts Come In

  • Be responsible and track what gifts you’ve received and from whom. This will make your life much easier later.
  • Put someone in charge of tracking gifts at each shower and taping cards to gifts for later.
  • Have someone you trust take care of wedding gifts received at the reception. Give that person a roll of tape to attach cards to gifts before transport.
  • Spend one evening writing thank-you notes for bridal shower gifts. Ask your spouse to help. This eliminates having to write so many after the wedding.
  • Acknowledge shipped gifts when you receive them, which is another way to save time after the wedding. This also lets the recipient know the gift has been received.
  • Order custom thank-you cards before the wedding when you’re ordering invitations to have them ready to go. Have stamps on hand, too. This lets you choose the stamps you want to use.
  • Print out return address labels or order them. Have two sets: one for before the wedding and one with your married name.
  • Separate notes are required for each gift at each party. You should not write one note to one person who attended the engagement party, bridal shower and wedding and gave you three gifts.

After the Wedding When You’re Writing Notes

  • Personalize each card. Reference the individual who gave you the gift and the gift itself.
  • Don’t feel as if you have to gush. Just be enthusiastic.
  • Don’t mention that you might return the gift.
  • For monetary gifts, mention how you used the funds. It’s okay not to mention the amount, but you can if you choose.
  • If you want to use wedding photos in the cards, make sure you can get them back promptly. Don’t delay sending notes because you’re waiting on photos.
  • Don’t use form letters or a pre-printed card.
  • Both of you should be involved in sending notes, no matter which side of the family gave the gift. This may be the first time you and your new spouse have to work together after the ceremony.
  • Do the thank-you notes in batches, say 20 every evening. It won’t take long to knock them all out and you won’t get so burned out as you do them.
  • If you aren’t familiar with the gift-giver, use formal greetings. It’s okay to address someone as “Mrs. Smith” if that’s how you know her.
  • It’s also very nice to address their presence at the wedding. You might even wish to send notes to everyone who attended.

No, you don’t have a year to write thank-you notes. At one time, that might have been the rule, but it’s not today. Get those notes out ASAP, within a month of your wedding. Your job isn’t done until the thank-yous have been sent.

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