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Planning an Affordable Funeral While Honoring Your Loved One

Funerals are expensive. Cremations, considered an affordable option when compared to funerals, are not quite as expensive but still a significant outlay that many people aren’t prepared for. Although the funeral industry is trying to find more affordable solutions to consumer demands, there’s also a perception that it is undignified to ask about costs and to have a funeral budget. When you’re spending so much money, you should make sure you’re getting your money’s worth and that you choose what you really want. Let’s dispel the myths about money and funerals and discuss some affordable options. 

Is a Budget-Friendly Funeral or Memorial Service Disrespectful to Your Loved One? 

Funerals are often considered the final celebration for a person, which means you shouldn’t scrimp or save. The truth is that most families remember their loved ones for many years, on their birthdays, at holidays and on the anniversary of the death. The funeral is a vital part of the grieving process, but it is in no way the last time you will honor the deceased. You can respect your loved one without spending thousands of dollars. With some planning, you can have a dignified service. 

3 Tips for Keeping Funeral Costs Low 

When you’re grieving, you may not feel like dealing with budgets, planning and all the legwork involved with a funeral. It is a lot easier to go along with whatever the funeral home recommends. Set your budget. Do some advance planning to avoid upsells at the funeral home. 

Consider What Kind of Service You Want 

Before talking to the professionals, have an idea of what kind of service you want. Are you planning on a burial or cremation? Where do you really want to hold the service — at the funeral home, the cemetery, a church, or in your backyard? Are you interested in a green burial? Do you have cultural or religious beliefs that you need to follow? Make a list of your priorities to help you stay focused on what is important to you. You may want to check with the VA to see if your loved one has any military benefits. 

Do Some Research 

It is okay to call around to get funeral costs before you decide on a funeral home. Funeral homes and cremation services are starting to publish costs online, which can make it easier. If you’re not up to the task, ask a couple of friends to help. A few phone calls could save you hundreds of dollars. It’s not disrespectful to shop around. 

Don’t Buy the Package Deal 

Funeral homes often package their services, but you don’t have to buy anything you don’t want. You can get flowers at any flower shop or purchase them online. You can also print your own memorial cards. There are no rules that you must hold the service at the funeral home. A family friend could officiate the service. Ask a musical friend to play music. 

Know That Funeral Planning Is Going To Be Difficult 

Even in the best of circumstances, when money isn’t an issue, planning the funeral of a loved one is stressful. When you’re dealing with financial issues, the tension can mount up. Remember that you have more time than you think. There may be pressure from the hospital to make arrangements, but you do have time to explore your options. It can help to talk to someone who has been through the process, or your clergy or a spiritual counselor.

Discussing death and funeral arrangements is uncomfortable, but it is part of the cycle of life. You don’t have to feel guilty for considering your budget during this difficult time. Honor your loved one to the best of your ability without putting your financial future at risk. 

Budgeting for the Wedding – Who Pays for What?

A person budgeting for a wedding

Proper budgeting is essential.

The cost of a wedding can approach the expense of new car or even more, depending on any number of items. According to The Huffington Post, a wedding in Quebec can run about $8,400 for just 77 guests, but one survey found that the average amount spent on a wedding was about $23,000. That figure does not include the engagement ring or honeymoon. Today’s couples have to make sure they have budgeted for their wedding. Traditionally, families were expected to help with the expenses, but in today’s environment, that isn’t always the case. Although the lines of who pays what for a wedding are definitely blurred, there are some customary divisions.

The Groom and His Family

The groom and his family have the easier burden when it comes to the wedding. The groom generally pays for the engagement ring and bride’s wedding ring. He should also expect to be responsible for:

  • His attire
  • Boutonnieres and corsages for his side of the wedding party
  • Officiant’s fee, plus accommodations and transportation
  • Marriage license
  • Bride’s gift
  • Gifts for the groomsmen
  • DJ or music at the reception
  • Liquor at the reception

Because the groom’s family traditionally hosts the rehearsal dinner, he or his family should expect to manage all the expenses associated with it.

The Bride and Her Family

Generally, if it isn’t in the groom’s list, it’s the bride’s responsibility. This includes the ceremony and reception expenses, as well as all of the planning, invitations, and photography. Most of the big ticket items are under the bride’s purview. The bride’s family is generally the one who hosts the engagement party, and the bride’s parents are considered the hosts of the reception. This is one reason their name is listed first on the invitation. If the bride hosts a luncheon for the bridesmaids, it is her responsibility to pay for the party.

The Attendants

Although the bride and groom are responsible for most of the expenses associated with the wedding, the attendants should pay for their own attire and accessories. Considerate brides and grooms may offer to assist with costs if the attendant is not able. The bride and groom may also need to provide attire for younger attendants such as the ring bearer or flower girl who do not have discretionary income.

The attendants generally work together to host the bachelor or bachelorette party, and the maid of honor and bridesmaids may host the bridal shower. Attendants should also arrange their own transportation to and from the wedding. Sometimes, the attendants chip in together for a gift for the couple, but it isn’t mandatory.

Contemporary Views of Who Pays

More couples are waiting until they are older and settled into a career and home before they tie the knot. This lets them contribute more money to their own affairs and not ask their parents to cover any expenses. Some families are splitting the bill in thirds, where the groom’s family, the bride’s family, and the couple each pay for one-third of the wedding.

Instead of looking at traditional lists of who pays for what, it’s important to consider the abilities of each party. Adult brides and grooms who have been managing their own finances should not expect parents to cover any of the costs. If the parent offers, then consider it a blessing and don’t ask for more. Second-time brides and grooms are pretty much on their own when it comes to wedding expenses.

Instead of making your wedding about money, take the time before you ever make plans to work out a budget and know exactly what you and your future spouse can afford. Stay within your budget to get started on the right foot without going into debt and dealing with a truckload of bills in your first year of marriage.